Tuesday, May 31, 2011

How can I convice my spouse that the sex scenes in my stories aren't my fantasies?

If you're a writer or author or are thinking about writing a story AND you're married, then there is a 99 % chance that you can relate to this subject.

I remembered the first time my husband sat in bed, reading my story The Unfaithful Widow. There were butterflies in my stomach  as I sat there watching television and biting my nails.  Not only was I nervous about what he thought about my story but I wondered what would be crossing his mind when he came to the "sex scenes".  Out of the corner of eye, I peeked to see where he was at in the story. He was on the page where my characters were engaged in phone sex. I could feel my face blushing as I continued to stare blankly at the television.
"Soooo you like phone sex?" My husband of fourteen years turns to ask me. I chuckled nervously. "Hun, it's just a story." I said truthfully. He gave me a curious look and continued to read.
Phewwww. That went better than I expected. But I knew it wasn't over. The butterflies were still fluttering as I waited for him to reach to another part in my story......The elevator scene.
NOOOO...these scenes in my book weren't from experience. They were just ideas that came to me and felt like a perfect fit for that particular part of the story.
I waited nervously as he continued to read, without as much as a glance in my direction or a word said. I don't know what was worse, the silence or the accusations.
Finally he closed the folder and looked at me and said. "I like it. I think you have a good story going on here."
I looked at him befuddled. That's it? He wasn't going to ask me where I got the idea of the elevator scene? I felt relieved in a way but then I didn't. I knew my husband. He was going to sit on this for a bit and let the story soak into his mind. It wasn't until the next day that he finally brought it up.
"Who did you have sex with in an elevator?" He accused.
"AHHH....I knew you were going to ask me that." I said. "Bob, it is just a story. I don't plan on these sex scenes, it just happens while I'm writing." I said honestly.
"Yeah, but these are your thoughts coming from your mind. Maybe subconsciously you want to have sex in  an elevator with a guy name Greg." He said. Oh great now he thinks he's a mind reader. So the argument was on. I had to explain to him that this is a story and nothing else. That he is the love of my life and there is no one else.
So what did I learn from this.........Never let your spouse read your stories unless you are up for ALOT of explaining.  Unless...you have one of  those supportive spouses who takes everything with a grain of salt...then....PFBLTTTTT!!!!   

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